Or so, the saying goes...
This has been a very challenging semester for me & the students I work with!
Since I'm still a student myself, balancing school & work while always giving time to Christ isn't the easiest to do. This past summer, my relationship with Christ was at its strongest. I can truly say, I was FILLED with His Holy SPirit. I meditated on Christ's Word night & day, read the bible everyday for hours at a time, humbled at the mercy Christ gives me & in effect, truly loved all people.
There was no evil that saturated in me, no wicked responses that I negatively reacted to & no fear of ministering to people about the Will of Yahweh & His gift of salvation for all that accept.
So, once the summer was coming to an end & I returned for the fall 2012 semester, I saw things differently. I was not at all pleased with the unclean spirits I felt around me. They weren't IN me, but they were present in my atmosphere through many people around me & it spiritually disgusted me.
Since I walked in the Holy Spirit, I was overtly sensitive to the spirit many people held. I could feel the heaviness of my professors and mentees, their fears/pain/stress/ even when they physically showed otherwise. The tuning of my spirit was so keen, I could hardly concentrate on worldly tasks. I wanted to go into ministry full-time & leave school, as a student, immediately!
I began to pray about this matter, asking Yahweh to reveal to me rather I should stay or leave. WHile waiting on an answer, satan was on my case HARD, trying to discourage my focus on the things of Yahweh. He was bringing unforeseen trials my way constantly. Yet, I still took great joy in being a child of THE KING OF KINGS, never being deterred of my faith in Christ.
My answer from Yahweh: I've placed you here for a reason not known entirely to you. Continue to minister my Word to people where you currently are.
This was NOT the answer I wanted! I just KNEW that Christ would've wanted me to get out there and use my entire day talking to the homeless & people in shelters, those in nursing homes. etc. about the Kingdom of Yahweh. However, Christ wanted me to stay here & continue in this journey, ministering & finishing school.
So I pulled back on my relationship with Christ. I still prayed and read the bible but I was not in so deep as before. I started concentrating more on my students & my personal schoolwork. I felt guilty, thinking I should still be greatly saturated in the Word. Yet, I kept going on the way I knew how throughout the semester.
By midterm, I was making all As in my classes & began focusing on one of my mentees that I call my little sister. Her experiences are parallel to what my mother endured as a young woman & after Christ continued to press upon me the responsibility of helping this young lady overcome spiritual bondage through the love of Christ, I surrendered.
It is the end of the Fall semester, my final grades were all As & now I'm personally mentoring a young lady that is well on her way to having a strong & consistent relationship with Christ.
I now think about if I were not obedient to Christ or second-guessed His purpose for myself, where would I be right now?
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| Megan & I (Left to Right) |
